Ended of the year with trainings and started the year going back to SP handball on a Friday night. The joy of being able to still play in the courts of SP gives me this familiar, happy feeling that I can’t find elsewhere. Maybe because it’s a place I spend almost half of my life there from 2012-2014 and the relationships that I took with me there are ones that I (hope) lasts for a lifetime.
Amidst being stuck in this state where I see myself not progressing any longer, I’m still grateful of people who never gave up in seeing what I can do. Even when time and time again I might not have played to what they have envisioned me to be. Even when I still take playing time for granted and not being able to perform. But coach was right about me setting my expectations too high and when I’m not being able to perform to that standard, it’s all in my mind that I stuck on the mentality of ‘not improving’.
And then we went on to talk about other things but I think she’s right about me taking charge of my own thoughts and actions. My own conscience and the things within my control. “She appreciates honesty” definitely.